Walked past a small gallery this morning—storefront barely wider than my shoulders, dusty window catching pale winter light at an angle that made the paintings inside glow like embers. I stopped because one piece pulled me in: thick layers of oil paint built up so high they cast shadows on themselves. Burnt sienna mixed with something closer to ash. The brushwork wasn't smooth; it was deliberate, almost angry, like the artist had wrestled the paint onto the canvas. I stood there long enough that the owner unlocked the door and waved me inside.

She said the artist worked with a palette knife instead of brushes for that series. Scraped the paint on in short, forceful strokes, then let it dry for weeks before adding another layer. The texture reminded me of tree bark—rough, living, full of grain. I'd always thought of oil painting as something delicate, but this felt more like sculpture. Up close, I could see fingerprints pressed into the wet paint in a few places, small accidents that became part of the work. She told me the artist left them intentionally. "Mistakes are just unplanned brushstrokes," she said.

I asked if I could take a photo, but she shook her head. "Some things need to stay here." I appreciated that. The piece wouldn't have translated to a screen anyway—the whole experience was in the light, the texture, the way the room smelled faintly of linseed oil and old wood. I thanked her and left, but the image stayed with me all afternoon. The way the shadows moved across those ridges of paint. The tension between control and surrender.

Tonight I tried working with thicker mediums in my sketchbook—layering gouache instead of watercolor, letting it sit unblended. It didn't look like much, but the process felt different. More resistant. Less forgiving. I kept thinking about those fingerprints, the way imperfection can anchor a piece in reality. Maybe I've been smoothing things out too much, trying to erase evidence of my hand. There's something honest about leaving traces behind.

The gallery's name was written in small serif type on the window: Ember & Ash. Fitting. That's exactly what the painting felt like—something that had burned and cooled, burned and cooled, until it became something new. I'll probably walk past it again tomorrow, just to see if the light hits it differently.

#art #painting #texture #process #creativity